My humble little blog

time really do flies. it has been the 3rd week of the last semester of poly for me.
everyday when i make my way to dover mrt, i would take a mental note to myself, that it is a reduction of a day from the remaining days i had in poly.
felt kinda sad actually, having to leave poly, or rather cadc soon.
but at the same time, kinda look forward to life after poly, which the next phrase is ns.
a new life, new begining then. it feels just like leaving secondary school for poly back then.
half of me wanted to remain at my spot, yet on the other hand wanted to move on too.
who knows how many friends i made in poly i could keep close contact with when all of us grad.
well, perhaps too much twist n turns happened for me in my life in poly already.
lookin way back, from freshmens to year 3, there were many ups n downs moments.
made many sacrifices, fu chu so much for certain stuffs, crossed many problems n hurdles.
but it was kinda disappointing on how everything ended up now.
so disappointing that even if i were to look at my batch's contact list right now, there weren't anybody that i thought i could had heart to heart talk, people that i really trust n hav a sense of belonging to.
when by right, i should have alot of them.
i kept telling myself to move on, move on and move on. but yet no matter how much i changed thruout the months, i still couldn't do it, deep down.
looking at secondary school frens, some of them still meet up regularly for stuffs etc. some of them still remain as zhi xing peng you, etc.
i felt guilty to my sec sch mates, esp the ones that i were used to be very closed with.
it just feels awkard to ask them out, or even talk to them.
even if were to meet up, it doesn't felt the same again.
i felt weak, lost at times. no direction, no assurance.
that is why i looked forward to life after poly, to experience a new begining, make more new friends, acheive as much as i could, create as much good memories as i could.
sometimes it feels exciting to think about that, but sometimes otherwise.
i guess at least several years down the road, i would not be able to let go of the attachment i got with club, and the friends i made in club.

everyday when i woke up, i told myself this.
it is a new day, a new begining again.
the events yesterday were unchangeable, the future is unpredictable.
so today, you only face today.
no matter how significance u tot of today, it is still a day.
make it good, not regreting the decisions i made, no matter how small or how big the matter is.
just wanted to make the most of the days left in poly.
it can be as simple as slackin arnd with frens, in club or outside, going to lessons, cramping in the damn packed mrt, going to lunch with mates, dotaing, bballing, jogging, play guitar, striving for bball intercons, teaching the juniors wadever i could, etc....
bcos once we grad, it will never be the same again.
so just cherish every moment of poly life.
so that i could leave poly life contently, with no regrets.